Monday, 13 November 2017

Why I dislike (some, not all) other parents


Unsolicited advice and the expectation to follow through - Yes, this is my first child. Yes, I have no frigging clue what I am doing. I just wing it and hope for the best! The fact that he is alive and happy today means I am doing something right. I am guilty of this too, to a certain extent but I always tell the person that I am offering my two cents - ultimately, the decision is up to the parents. What pisses me off is when someone gives me their advice, insist I take it (although they know nothing about my family) and get angry when I don't. There is a fine line between a well-meaning person to someone trying to interfere with your personal family life! Usually this type of parent goes hand in hand with...

The my kid is better than your kid pissing contest. Ugh! Eye roll!
It started after I had my kid.The sancti-mommies came out from under their rock. I bottle-fed, I was shamed. I didn't co sleep, I was made to feel like I abandoned my kid. No matter what I did or didn't do, there was an annoying sancti-mommy there telling me how I am doing it wrong, how their precious angel hit (insert age appropriate milestone here) early. It was all thanks to their expert parenting and I need to do what they are doing.

That judgmental stare - Perhaps it is me but I know most parents judge. Hell, I have done it before I had a kid and thought I knew everything! Karma came around and bit me in the ass because boy, did I ever learn my lesson! I stopped doing that! There was this other Mom in my kid's school who used to give me dirty looks (I started calling her good old stink eye) and then gossip about me to other parents. 

This is my all time favourite: Breast vs bottle debate. While I admit, I have encountered a lot of fanaticism on the whole pro breastfeeding side, I also encountered a lot of bitterness (most of it my own) over bottle feeding. Perhaps it is because my son is going on eight years old and I no longer need to worry about such issues. This sometimes goes hand in hand with my kid is better than your kid type of parent. Some people bottle feed because low milk supply does happen despite what your breastfeeding bible tells you. Sometimes, fed is better. 


Being openly involved in a subculture and often wearing something that is outside the mainstream, I get stares and rude remarks. One woman wouldn't let her daughter play with my son and actually did the sign of the crucifix. Yes, because my blonde haired kid wearing brightly coloured clothes he chose to wear that morning is the spawn of Satan. Don't let those blue eyes and that cherub like appearance deceive you, he will devour your precious little angel's soul and spit out her bones!

*Insert tongue in cheek*

My unsolicited advice to any parent out there and no don't worry, I will never insist that you take it: do what you think is best for your family and enjoy the moments you have with your children. They do grow very fast and I always knew when my son was a baby that in 5 years, certain things that seemed important at that time wouldn't matter. I enjoyed his babyhood and I am glad I did. I didn't pay attention to what everyone else was doing. I did what I thought was best and consulted my pediatrician for advice. I am so blessed to have such a sweet, wonderful little boy. Very recently, I made a very hard decision to either continue being a working mom or be a stay at home one for a while. I chose to stay at home. I regretted not staying home sooner and blamed myself for some of the difficulties my son is having. I know now that it was never my fault. I did what I thought was best and I always have his best interest at heart. I learned that no matter the choice a parent makes, we make them out of love, out of the best interest for our child and family's well-being.So please do what is right for YOU and YOUR family and fuck what anyone else has to say.


2 comments:

  1. It's a good thing I was never a parent. I'd be telling people off left, right and centre, LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The world would be so much better if people just learned to mind their own business. The only case where I interfere (although I'm not a parent) is when I see smoker parents with babies or worse, pregnant.

    ReplyDelete

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